Beowulf (Film)

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Director: Robert Zemeckis
Cast : Ray Winstone, Anthony Hopkins, Angelina Jolie, John Malkovich, Brendan Gleeson, Dominic Keating, Alison Lohman, Robin Wright Penn
RunTime: 110 mins
Genre: Animation
Rating: NC-16 (Violence and Some Nudity)

Virtual imitates life as the sexy one emerges all of water saying, “Beowulf... Stay with me. Give me a son, and I shall make you the greatest king that ever lived. This... I swear...” She wears nothing but gold paint covering over her ample bosoms, all thick lips and hair extended to a lizard’s tail.

Her name is Angelina Jolie, playing the role of monster Grendel’s mother, a seductive create known to bed Kings in this animated epic Beowulf. The role of the third party shouldn’t be anything new to her. She refuses to let her children watch Beowulf, and we wonder why. (“Mummy, why are you stealing husbands?” )

The film is directed by Robert Zemeckis and was created through motion capture, a technique similar to that used by Zemeckis in The Polar Express. The rest of the cast includes heavyweights Ray Winstone, Anthony Hopkins, Robin Wright Penn, Dominic Keating, Alison Lohman, and John Malkovich.

People watch Beowulf for two reasons: For its impressive animated motion capture, or for Mrs Pitt coming out of the water. As male audiences breathe in deeply, that is what I call ‘stop motion’. Ray Winstone was equally impressive as well, though his Austin Power moments in this animation got either blushes or chuckles chucker from shy girls.

Adapted from an old English heroic poem about a battle hero overcoming monsters, the movie brings epic animations to new grounds. Like adrenalin pumping computer games, it is littered with intense fights and sexual allusion (nudity expected). Some things are still missing (other than clothes), and perhaps it’s the emotional depth that only the human eye can portray.

Beowulf – Be seduced

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